Sister Synonymous With Mistakes
by Kate-Emma
Summary: Complete - When the valued sister of a crew member falls sick, it is up to their friends to keep them on their feet during this time, and in the meantime they learn a valuable lesson about life before the Hammersley. Spider, Bomber and RO.
1. Sisters Synonymous With Mistakes

Sister… Synonymous with Mistakes  
_by Kate-Emma and Holly Dixon_

**sister**|sis-tər|  
_noun_

**1 **a woman or girl in relation to other daughters and sons of her parents

According to the New Oxford American Dictionary a sister is a relative, a sibling and a girl of shared blood. But to me she was always something more. To me she was…

… the bane of my existence  
… my conscience  
… a mystery

To me my sister was someone I never really knew, I never really appreciated and never really valued. But that didn't mean I didn't love her, and when she nearly went away, I knew then that I'd have to make this right…

Spider/Bomber/RO  
with; Gemma Webb, Rick Webb, Jessica Carlisle, Holly Dixon and Kelly Dixon

When the valued sister of a crew member falls sick, it is up to their friends to keep them on their feet during this time, and in the meantime they learn a valuable lesson about life before the Hammersley and how no one really knows what they've got until it's gone. Especially when they're blood.


	2. Chapter One: Of The Land

Chapter One;  
Of The Land

_… she was the bane of my existence._

April 20th. A Ram. I was 3 years old already at the time. I'm a Capricorn. She was small, chubby but already 10 times more adorable than I could ever be. I knew then that she would, single-handedly, have the ability to make my life miserable. And the worse thing was that there was nothing I could do about it. She was my baby sister and I had to look after her. Jessica Leah Brown, world's worst sister.

I hadn't wanted a sister, and neither had my father, but it seemed that the Brown family was destined to a life of fighting girls and my parents didn't have enough to support a third child, even if it was father's desired boy, so they were left with us: the two most opposite sisters you could find. Where Jessie was a quiet child, I was loud. Where Jessie excelled, I failed. Where Jessie won, I lost. She was intelligent and witty. I was sporty and fun. She liked to sit inside, read and watch television documentaries. I liked to get on my push bike, race the local boys and spend the day climbing trees. I had my first boyfriend at 12. I dumped him two weeks later. Jessie didn't have her first boyfriend until she was 16. She married him. They're still together. They have a son. I always said she was switched at birth, there was no way she could be my sister, but I knew she was. And my love for her was unconditional.

Our life was never easy. In fact, through the years, we endured enough to make us the best of friends, but for some reason this didn't happen. Our differences were too big when we were children and an excuse to fight when we were teenagers. Then, I left, and there was little time to make things okay. Naturally I was at her wedding, but I missed out on being maid of honour or even a bridesmaid because of how little we knew about each other. Jessie commented after the hen's night that she hadn't been sure I'd like to be a bridesmaid, she thought it wasn't my thing, and I'd just smiled and agreed. But in truth I'd been hurt that we hadn't known little things like that about one-another. I'd wanted to be her bridesmaid. But I never told her that.

Our grandfather, the kindest man in the world besides our father, died when we were 11 and 8. Our grandmother and both of our mother's parents had died before either of us were born and 'grandpappy' was the last of our grandparents. He made up for it by spoiling us every single day, even if he had to go out of his way to make sure it happened. He treated us with stories, many of them of his times on the sea. He'd been in the Navy when he was younger and had fought in New Guinea during the war. He told stories of mateship, being a larrikin and his exploits on the high seas. And when he didn't have a story about his adventures, he'd make one up. Jessie loved stories about pirates and every weekend he'd have a new one to tell us. We'd sit, cross-legged, on the floor of his living room with a cup of milk and one of his digestives and listen to his stories. Although he was old and had a bad hip, he'd nearly always jump to his feet and do an impersonation of him sword-fighting a pirate. More than once he knocked over a badly-placed cup of milk and would sit down with a chuckle as mum fussed. And as soon as the milk was dried up he'd be back on his feet, jabbing the air as we stared up at him with laughter (me) and amazement (Jessie). As we got older the pirate tales became less and less and the reminiscing became more prominent. He'd tell us about all his mates on the ship, that HMAS Illawara, and all the good times. Naturally he didn't talk about the war itself, but painted for us an image of mateship and interdependence that made Jessie smile but really affected me. I didn't know it then, at only 11, but he paved my future for me. His stories were why I ran away to the Navy.  
Arthur Brown, our grandfather, RAN sailor and war hero, died August 21st 1998, aged 83.

When Jessie was 12 she developed an eating disorder, bulimia. I was 15 at the time and myself facing the usual pressures to look a certain way and be a certain way, but I ignored them. I was your stereotypical tomboy, one of the boys and the one most likely to deck you if you suggested otherwise. But Jessie had just started high school and was being pressured enough because she was your stereotypical geek. The kids in her grade all looked at her like she was an outcast. It didn't help that we were out-of-towners. Although Mount Isa had a high school, we travelled for 35 minutes every day to attend a high school in the next town over simply because mum had the impression that the school was bigger and therefore more likely to offer a good education. She was wrong, but by the time she figured that out I was already a big fan of the place and Jessie had started Year 7. And it was because I liked the high school that I never stood up for Jessie at school when they ridiculed her about knowing more than them and wearing glasses (reading glasses only, but still enough to warrant teasing in many kids' eyes). I never stood up to the kids that teased her and I often pretended she wasn't my sister. I ran away when she came to find me. I pushed her back in the car when I got out so no one would see me walk in with her. I ignored her when she looked at me. I was cool in my year and I didn't need my little nerd of a sister pulling that away from me. I owed her nothing. Eventually she gave up trying and we carried on this way for almost two years. Not that she minded. She didn't need me to be her hero. It was during these hard times that she met Thomas Carlisle, two years her senior and the boy that always chased the bullies away. He was her best-friend. And it was him that approached me in a quiet corridor half-way through that year demanding I pay more attention to my sister.  
"Excuse me." A voice said. I turned, shoving me hands in my pockets, and staring at the kid who'd disturbed my very animated discussion with a friend called Corey about the merits of skateboarding over rollerblading. "You're Rebecca Brown aren't you?"  
I glared at him. No one ever called me Rebecca anymore. At school I was Bec, and only Bec, even the teachers knew that. But he didn't flinch at all at the stare and so I just raised an eyebrow at him. "Yeah, what do you want?"  
He held his ground and I recall feeling impressed. Although he was almost my height, the three boys behind me towered over him. Had I been in his situation I never wouldn't approached me, but maybe I'm putting too many tags on myself and I wasn't as hardcore as I like to think I was. "My name is Thomas Carlisle, I'm in Year 9. I'm sure you don't know me but I'm your sister Jessica's friend."  
I glanced back at the other three and waved them away. They grinned at the mention of 'my sister' then left. I turned back to him. "What about my sister?" I spat the word 'sister' out with as much venom as it deserved.  
Thomas just sighed. "I kind of hoped you'd noticed but evidently not." He frowned and I sensed a little superiority in his voice and fought the urge to hurt him. "She's doing something stupid to herself and I don't know how to make her stop. I was hoping you could help me."  
My glare and dislike fell then at the concept that Jessie was in trouble and I hadn't noticed. I felt like the most horrible person on this planet. "What? What do you mean?" I asked, my voice faltering as he spoke. And when he said what I'd been dreading I could only gape, all the moments I'd missed suddenly coming back.  
"She's been making herself sick." He explained. The images of Jessie eating more than her fair share of food. The memories of her rushing off to the bathroom after dinner, claiming she felt ill. The times i'd caught her sitting on the bathroom floor in tears for no reason whatsoever. It all made sense now and suddenly I felt ill. How had I not noticed this before? I looked up at Thomas and saw the sincerity in his face. He really cared about Jessie, in a way I never had, and for that I wanted to hug him. But right now I had a sister to find.  
"Thank you." I managed in a struggled whisper. He nodded as I caught myself. My voice returned to normal as I looked at him. "Where is she?"  
That afternoon at home, after forcing Jessie to the table, we spoke to mum and dad. They were horrified. Busy with the farm they too hadn't noticed Jessie's problem, but now it was spoken about openly. Jessie cried, hard racking coughs of tears that made my heart break. If only I'd noticed this earlier. But we were in luck that Thomas had caught it early. She got counselling. Within 13 months she was normal again. Not that it mattered. The day after her 14th birthday, Dad died.

He hadn't been sick. He hadn't even been complaining. And he certainly hadn't stopped or even slowed working. So when mum came out on that Thursday afternoon when we were at school and found dad laying in the back paddock, virtually unconscious, she hadn't expected such a thing to happen. She called the school from the hospital and we were dragged out of there, driven to the hospital by my friend Chris who came for support. Jessie bought Tom. With the boys waiting in the waiting room, I recall clearly Jessie and I walking slowly into the room where dad lay, connected up to machines making all kinds of noises. Mum sat in the corner, distraught and with tears running down her cheeks. Jessie rushed straight over to her, but having never been really close with my mother (we were too alike to get along, I realise now) I went instead to dad's bedside. He wasn't in a good state, and wasn't conscious when I joined him, but as I sighed at the sight of him he woke up slowly.  
"Hey champ." He said, giving me a grin. I frowned down at him and he laughed softly, weakly. "Don't look at me like that Becca, I feel like I've done something wrong."  
I sighed. "Sorry dad." Emotion finally got the better of me and I felt a single tear slide down my cheek. "What happened dad?"  
He lifted a hand and wiped the tear off my cheek. "Nothing Pumpkin." He smiled at the nickname only he could use. "C'mon, you know it takes more than a silly heart to bring us Browns down."  
But it didn't. A little after Jessie and I left for home, Dad had another heart attack. This time he didn't wake up. To this memory my final memory of dad is that moment, which is a shame because he was such a loud and wild creature. Like our grandfather. And that was the last day I loved Mount Isa. After that my mind and my home was elsewhere.  
Neil Patrick Brown, my father, died June 11th 2004, aged 57.

After that things went slowly downhill. Mum became a totally different creature, a cold and unforgiving one that I hadn't known before. We'd always fought relentlessly, but all of a sudden we fought about everything. Jessie became depressed and was diagnosed with depression a few months later. We were lucky we had Tom to look after her, because we were falling apart. I bypassed many of the 5 stages of loss and went straight to anger. I was angry at everyone and anyone that passed me in the street. Already around town I was considered insane, but now I was attacking passers-by I suddenly became someone to fear. Anything went wrong it was 'that Brown girl' and I was hauled into the cop shop more times than I needed for disturbing the peace. They never arrested me though, everyone knew why and I thank them for that. But I gave my mother and sister more grief than they needed. Just after my 18th birthday I knew what I needed to do. I couldn't stay in this town anymore, and I couldn't keep hating myself. I knew I had to leave and I knew where to. I was going to join the Navy.  
Telling my sister and mother wasn't the easy part either. In fact, I was quickly accepted and before I even had a chance to tell the last of my family, the Navy wanted me to fly to Melbourne for recruiting school. So, putting off the inevitable, I finally approached them. It was hard.  
Mum was furious, said I was being stupid and that I had no idea what I was doing. I said otherwise and that I'd put a lot more thought into it than she had when she'd decided only two months ago to start dating again. She said that was none of my business and so I replied that the Navy was none of hers. It was then that she pulled out the coldest thing she'd ever said to me.  
"In that case, go. But if you do, don't ever come back, you're not welcome here anymore."  
I took it as free reign to leave and turned away, only to find Jessie standing at the doorway, having heard the entire thing. I'd been hoping to tell her myself, not this way. I stepped towards her but she ran from the house and I lost her in the distance, sprinting away from me.  
That night I packed my stuff and stayed with Chris. He was supportive enough, although he didn't understand, and a week later I left for Melbourne. I haven't been home since.


	3. Chapter Two: Daddy's Little Soldiers

Chapter Two;  
Daddy's Little Soldiers

_…She was my conscience_

I was born in Darlinghurst Private Hospital. Room 222. At 4:45pm. On Monday, September 4th 1980. A Virgo. She's a Gemini. She was 2. She told me a few years later when I could understand what she was saying, that I was chubby, pink, wrinkly and, to put it simply, ugly. I see baby pictures of myself and tell her that I _was_ ugly. I mean compared to her I was. She always seemed the perfect child. I would never compare. My first memory of my sister is long chestnut curls and dark brown eyes staring at me with wonderment and awe. I was born Robert James Dixon.

Our family was upper class. We lived on the 'upper East side' if you will of Darlinghurst. Holly went to an all girl school and I want to an all boy school. So we were educated properly. We hated it too. Education to me was waste of time. But I'd eat my words later in life. We had two pets. A cat and Dog. But I had bad experiences with them. The dog (Summer) almost took my hand off when I was 4 and the cat (Chelsea) left me with scratches when I was 6. So I hated them. I was allergic to Dogs anyway. So that's another reason why I'm not a cat or dog type person.

My relationship with Holly had never been a terribly close one. We were from two different worlds. Her world was somewhere where the sky was the limit. My world was where everything was impossible. My place was the water and her place was the sky. We often fought too; mostly over small things, like why I never ate my vegetables. Being two years my senior made her think she could do everything for me and sometimes she still does. But at times it helps me. I know if I had the chance to live she'd give up her life for me. But she also knows I'd do the same for her. She was hospitalised when I was 5 (she was 7), because she'd gone swimming with me and almost drown. She had never been a strong swimmer. One memory of my troubled and hurt-filled childhood is the name that had hung above her bed as she sat there and tried to help me spell my name correctly. _Dixon, Holly Elizabeth._ She was bigger, stronger and always more reckless than my parents liked, but aside from our fights, I loved her. She was my big sister, my protector.

Our mother died when I was just 7 years old. It broke Holly and Dad. Although I remember crying as I stood next to Holly as they lowered Mum's coffin into the ground I can't remember seeing her or Dad cry. Our Aunts and Mum's friends cried. Some of Dad's army mates had helped carry and lower the coffin. I clearly remember burying my head into Holly's chest and crying. She was 9. She may have shed tears when I wasn't watching but she never did when I was watching her. Although I found her a few days later in her room crying. I sat with her for a while putting my arms around her, knowing if her hugs made me feel better maybe my hugs would make her feel better. After a few minutes she spoke, her voice somewhat chocked and strained against the emotion she was unfamiliar with.  
"I'm ok Robbie. Just had something in my eye," That was Holly putting her tears down to an irritation.  
"You were crying. You always tell me that tears aren't a sin. So don't worry about crying in front of me Holly." I told her. She smiled and got up she grabbed a few tissues and wiped her eyes then helped me to my feet. She'd never admit to it but she cried more times after that. I used to hear her at night crying. But I'd never go to her side. She'd deny that they were tears about mum. But my hugs helped. I knew I had made a difference.

When I first started school she'd walk home with me. As we got older we had to walk home at different times. I'd have to go home by myself after swim team practice or a meeting or she's come wandering in at 5:30 because she'd had a gym team meeting. The afternoons I had swim team, I'd come running inside and come to skidding halt in from of my sister who had just placed a plate of biscuits on the table. We had impeccable timing but she slap my hand away from the biscuits and tell me that I need to wash my hands first. So off I'd go and wash my hands.  
"They're filthy! Go and wash them! You don't want to get sick do you? Go on! Go and wash them first!" When I'd come back she'd have placed a glass of milk with the biscuits. So I could sit there and do my homework with a drink and some food, so that I wouldn't be hungry before dinnertime.

Our family went downhill when I was 9. I remember now. Holly was 11. She came home one day from Gym practice and she found our father, Gerald, asleep at the kitchen table. A small collection of bottles in front of him. She counted them. 6 and all had various strong types of alcohol in them. Brandy, gin, rum, tequila, vodka, whisky. She removed the bottles and threw them out, before proceeding to try and wake him. She woke him eventually and got him to go to bed. She'd left him there to sleep it off, and that did him a world of good, or at least that's what we thought. When he woke he was angry and neither Holly nor myself could work out why. I had always thought that alcohol was like toys for adults – remembering I was only a child. They enjoyed drinking it so I made a vow that when I got older I'd drink it too. I hadn't yet seen the effect it had on my father's temper.

But it got worse as I got older it seemed. Holly and I grew slightly closer as the years dragged on mostly because she stood up to Dad's girlfriends. Most of who were blonde bimbos after his money, which for someone who used to be in the Army he had a lot of. Most of it was the Veteran Pension. We figured also a lot of it was Mum's money; she'd been a lawyer. There was one girlfriend Holly and I both hated. And I never liked any girl with that name or nay name like it afterwards. Her name was Bridgette. She treated both Holly and I like we were little kids. I was 14 when she came to live with us. I can't believe he asked her to move in. I was fuming because I didn't want a stepmother and what kind of stepmother would she be? She was barely older than Holly! Holly was 16 and Bridgett had to be 25. My father had officially gone mad.

Bridgette didn't last long though. Dad got bored and threw her out. But it was Melody who I hated the most. Holly wasn't home a lot at this point. She was at University, learning mechanics. Melody was Dad's girlfriend when I turned 16. Apparently he's still with her too, now at least 11 years later. I hated every one of Dad's girlfriends but Melody was my most hated. She treated me like I was still 6 years old. Holly was 18 and stood up to her, when she was home.  
"In case you have noticed, _Mel_ (this was spat out with venom), my brother and I are 16 and 18. Not 6 and 8! We are not toys you can play with when you get bored with our father. If you want toys to play with I'm sure I can lend some of my dolls!" Holly had often yelled at Dad's girlfriends, but never had one of them hit Holly. Holly was Dad's last reminder of Mum. Because they looked so alike. But Melody hit Holly. Hard. Mostly it was slaps but in this case it was a punch. Holly was hardly ever left standing. For a 29 year old Melody was strong, she'd grab my wrists and tell me if I told my dad anything about it, she'd make sure I went to boarding school, not that it mattered, anything I told Dad was a lie and anything I did was wrong. He abused me, as I got older. Emotionally and Psychologically. But I had to change that and I did when I turned 18.

Somehow Holly got wind of what I was planning but she swore she'd never tell Dad. I was smart enough to get into ADFA but refused my entry. I didn't need to go to school to do what I was going to do. My sister, now 20 years old, had gone to University for a few years after leaving school at 17 to study mechanics. She scored a place in the Air Force as a mechanic, and as she worked on their planes, she also learned how to make other things work, not to mention she worked her way up the ranks too. Irreplaceable as the mechanic, she stayed as the mechanic who knew everything, given the nickname of "GT" and "Sorella" she worked with passion and she passed that passion onto me.

My father on the other hand wasn't as supportive of my choice. He shook me a few times, not to mention yelled at Holly for allowing me to do such a thing as I was. I can still remember his words.  
"You stupid, stupid boy!" my ears still ring with them, abusive shakes that could've easily broken my neck, but they never did because Holly was there – and his gaze would go to her and he'd stop. She was his eldest and most responsible, so it was her fault I was doing this.  
"You're letting him do this! You silly girl! You know he can do more than throw away these chance he has!" But Holly always my protector saw her chance to dig her heels in and tell him what she truly thought of him.  
"Dad, Robert is finally going to do something he going to be good at and he'll love. He's going to be able to help people like you did. Fight for his country. There is nothing more honourable than that, you know that. Sure maybe he won't be on a frigate but a patrol boat is just as honourable." Dad at this let me go and stood up, glaring at her, "You never thought Robert was good enough. Everything he told you was a lie and everything he did, he did it wrong. Why? He's your son. You're only boy. So I'm a replica of Mum, Robert is a spitting image of you when you were his age! Can't you let him do something his way for once?" She was angry at him. Dad looked at me. His eyes darted from a photo of him when he was 18 and then back to me. There was no denying it. I did look just like him. And I hated it.

Something else happened when I was 18 as well. But I didn't know until six months later. Holly got hold of me when I was on shore leave, she was working the bar at the pub me and some of my crewmates were at. When she spotted me. I tried to pretend I didn't know her, but when her shift finished she dragged me outside into the rain and spoke heatedly to me.  
"Holly!" I protested, "we'll get wet! And the guys, they'll talk." I always hated it when rumours went round about me – there were a few already and now this would make another one.  
"Let them draw their own conclusions. Look I need to tell you something that is possibly going to change your life forever." She growled.  
"I'm listening." I said crossing my arms across my slightly stronger chest then it had been a few years ago.  
"We have a sister." It took a few seconds for what she said to sink in.  
"What?! Since when!" I demanded the information about this sister I had.  
"Since six month ago. Look I didn't tell you because you were on the Canberra. I couldn't reach you. Melody has been denied custody and I have to look after her daughter. Melody's gone to drugs and Dad is still drinking. Look Robbie, I wish I could've told you earlier but it kinda happened really quickly. I'm still reeling. Please don't look at me like that," I was pulling my best 'I'm not impressed' look on her, "Robbie come on. I'm serious about this. Her name is Kelly Isabel and she's beautiful, look here's a picture." She handed me a Polaroid of a beautiful brunette child, barely 5 months old. She was staring at the camera in wonderment. But she looked remarkably like Dad. Nothing like her mother.  
"Are you sure she's Melody's?" I asked.  
"Of course I'm sure. Mum's dead." Holly said. That was Holly, blunt and straight to the point. I sighed and shook my head.

It wasn't until I was stationed on the Hammersley that Holly and I started to drift apart again. I was sent a package about six weeks into the Hammersley's last six months. It didn't surprise me that the package was addressed such: _LS_ _Robert J Dixon c/o HMAS Hammersley _it was Holly's handwriting. She'd sent it, which surprised me because in an email she'd sent only four days ago she'd said that she resented me for not being at Dad's funeral. She hated me but she'd still sent this to me. I knew what it was…Melody would've wanted me to have them. Dad's ashes. So far I haven't spoken to Holly since she introduced me to Kelly, via photo, nine years ago.


	4. Chapter Three: Just A Child

Chapter Three;  
Just A Child

_… she was a mystery._

I was the baby of three; the mistake, my brother Rick had told me many times. When everything went wrong though he was the mistake. I was only 10. He was 19. She was 13. They were going to a party that was not meant for children, so I stayed at home with mum and dad. I still remember clearly that call. It was a little after 10pm. Mum answered the phone and then, a few seconds later, she dropped it. There had been an accident. That was the day I lost my sister.

My first memory of her was when I was really young – but now she is as she is my most treasured memory is when I was 5 and she was teaching me to spell our names. I knew mine already, but hers was a lot harder. I couldn't understand why her name wasn't spelt with a J. And then there was the middle name. It was all too hard. But I know it clearly now, having seen it written down and positioned above her bed too many times. Webb, Gemma Victoria: my sister.

I was born at the Royal North Shore Private Hospital in Sydney on the 16th of March 1989, the second son of Julie and Alexander Webb. My brother, Richard Alexander, was the first-born of the family and 9 years my senior. Although he was my brother he wasn't my favourite sibling. In fact, he rather liked pretending I didn't exist. The age difference helped that, and to this day I don't know my brother the way I'd like. It doesn't help that he now lives in Perth with his wife Sarah and two daughters Charlie and Prue. He's a lawyer. It was a job he was destined for. He always thought he was bigger than our family. Which was probably why dad and he never got along. Dad is a third-generation cane farmer and was always of the land. But while my brother and sister were born in the local hospital at (Spider's home town), the time of my birth had been during a hard time for my family and a time when the cane farm had fallen through. It broke my mum's heart, but dad went mentally and physically downhill when the farm began to fail. So, heavily pregnant with his third child, mum and my siblings escaped to Sydney where her sister lived with our cousins Jason and Kellie. So it was that I came to be the only Webb child born in Mum's home town, something that I think contributed to me being the obvious favourite my entire life, and I lived there until I was 3. Meanwhile dad sought help to make sure his family came back, but at age 12 Rick had already got his taste for the big city and didn't want to go back. We went back just in time for me to be enrolled at the local primary school. The farm became more prosperous and things went great. And then Gemma's accident. Mum couldn't handle it and went to live with her sister for a month, leaving me and Rick with dad. Gemma was still in a coma. It was at this time that Rick moved away too, evidently feeling that if mum could get away than he could too. Gemma woke up from her coma eventually, but she was never good again. She went into a young person's nursing home, but it was in Sydney, the only place she could get a spot. Then life went back to normal as much as it could, but it was just me and my parents. My family had died that night.

I was awful at high school and the only reason I actually managed to avoid getting kicked out was because I never did anything to bug people, I was just genuinely dumb. So it seemed almost certain that I was destined to follow in my father's footsteps and inherit the cane farm. And while that didn't bother me, my father had bigger plans for me.  
"Son, we need to talk about next year. Your mother and I have agreed that you should stay at school and do your senior years." He said, sitting me down at the kitchen table with one of his 'time for a serious talk' looks. I was 16 at the time and the only things serious to me were my campaign to get the school hottie Ashley Bateman and find a way to get out of the house on Saturday night and attend a party in the next town, a party that was clearly not one my parents would approve of. I wasn't prepared for the big future talk. And the idea of staying on hadn't even occurred to me.  
I just frowned at him. "Are you serious dad? The chances of me passing the Year 10 exam are slim, but carrying on to seniors? What are we talking here? University? Cos if that's the case then you're mad, no offence." I offered with a smile.  
Dad sighed. "William, you need a good education. I don't like to say this, but I don't think the farm will last much longer. I'm not leaving you with a dud farm and a sub-standard education."  
I glanced up at him. "What do you mean leaving?"  
Dad frowned. "You know what I mean. If something happens to me I want you to be stable. You mother and I would like to see one of our kids turn out alright."  
After that comment I felt too horrible to say anything and just agreed. I passed my exams and stayed on to senior school, but more for the girls than my study, and finally left just after my 17th birthday. But dad didn't mind too much. I had a job lined up. I was off to the Navy.

The Navy idea had been dad's idea, although he hadn't known it when he'd done it. It was a few weeks after my exams and just before I started Year 11 and dad and I went camping. It was his idea of a bonding session for us 'men' and while we barely went 10 kilometres from the farm, it was far enough. We stood on a ledge and stared back at our property, a maze of green and brown. To me it was beautiful, it was home, but dad just frowned at it. After that he turned and stared out in the other direction. The only thing that way was the sea. And with his back to the farm my father looked so content. It was then that I realised my choice. The farm was failing, I had no education and no idea what I wanted to do. Now there was a choice and before I made it I knew that was enough. The farm or the sea. I chose the sea.  
Dad was thrilled. Mum was scared.

"Sweetie, are you sure about this? There's still time to back out, I'm sure they won't mind." My mother was buzzing around me using the same line she'd been using for months now. I gave her the same smile I always had.

"Mum, I'll be fine." I chuckled, putting my bags in the boot of the car.  
She frowned at my father. "This is your doing Alexander, you and your big dreams."  
Dad held up his hands. "I'm not taking the blame for this Julie. I just wanted him to get a decent high school education."  
Mum turned on me. "Why not do that then? Why the Defence Force? It's dangerous!"  
I slammed the car boot. "Mum, I'm off to the recruiting school now, so in all honesty it's a bit late." She frowned at me. "I'll be fine. Anyway, I'm getting my HSC remember, and the Defence Force is paying for it."  
After that she ceased her campaign. I knew that she supported me and my choice, she was just worried about me, I was the last of what had once been a rather large brood of children. Now the family home was empty. Gemma was in Sydney, Rick in Perth and I was off to recruiting school in Melbourne. I felt bad about leaving them, but the Navy was my future. And this mess that had been my family was my past. It was cold but the way I looked at it.

So, that afternoon in June, when the CO came to me with an urgent request to phone home I felt immediately that the stability I had built for myself in the last 2 ½ years was about to be lost. My sister was in a bad way, according to my aunt, and there was nothing anyone could do to help her. My family needed my support, but I couldn't be there for them. There was only person who would do. And he was in Perth.

… _My sister is a big part of who I am._


	5. Chapter Four: News Travels

Chapter Four;  
News Travels

RO held the phone up. "Sir." He held the phone up and Mike Flynn took it quickly, listening to the voice on the other end as he explained the situation to the Hammersley commanding officer. It had been a quiet afternoon in the Coral Sea, unusual for the crew of the Hammersley who sometimes wondered whether someone had installed a trouble beacon on the side of their ship and never turned it off, and the phone call was the first sign of life. For that reason everyone on the bridge turned their heads expectedly, hoping in some twisted way that it was a call to arms, but they were disappointed when the CO hung up the phone and glanced up at the awaiting eyes. He only met one of them and walked over to the figure sitting at the EOD.  
"Seaman Webb, that was a request to phone home immediately." He told the man, who frowned at him.  
"Uh, yes sir." He glanced up at RO, who was already standing prepared to take Spider down to the Comm Room, but the CO shook his head.  
"No, use my phone Spider." He glanced up at the XO. "X?"  
Kate McGregor nodded. "C'mon Spider."  
Now looking more than worried, Spider followed the X downstairs. RO sat back down, frowning at the departing figure. Nav glanced up at Swain, who was sitting at the controls, with worry in her eyes. And Charge lowered his eyebrows. But the CO just sat back down, ignoring their looks of worry. He knew what was going on, and he knew that if they wanted to know they'd have to get it out of Spider. It wasn't his place to quieten their fears.

The X shut the door once Spider had taken a seat at the CO's desk and had the phone to his ear, preparing to phone home, but his hand shook with worry. In his heart he knew something bad had happened, his parents wouldn't have called unless it was very bad, and names ran through his head. Mum, dad, Aunt Rose, Gemma, Rick, Sarah, Jason, Kellie… the list went on. That was one problem with having such a large family, there were so many to lose. Eventually the realisation that not knowing would haunt him more, Spider dialled.  
"Hello?" A male voice answered the home phone and Spider frowned.  
"Uncle Greg?" He asked, his father's brother's voice a little shaky.  
"Will? Oh mate, thank goodness you called. Here, I'll get your father." The sound of a phone moving could be heard before Spider had a chance to say anything. Then he heard Greg call out his father's name. "Alex, Will's on the phone." The phone bounced around in hands and then Spider heard his father's anxious voice.  
"Billy? Oh, I'm sorry we had to disturb you son, I know you're working." He rushed, apologetic. But Spider didn't need apologies, he needed to know what was wrong.  
"Dad? Dad, what's happened? Is it mum?" He asked, thankful he could cross his father off the list of people he'd subconsciously started to compile in his head.  
"No son, it isn't your mother. It's Gemma."  
Spider gaped. His sister. He should've guessed. "What? What's happened?" The memory of the last time he'd seen his sister, that day at the docks when she had insulted him in front of Bomber, replayed in his head. She'd been so full of life then, like the sister he'd known before her accident, but now it seemed she'd gotten worse.  
"She's had one of her seizures. But it was worse than usual. She didn't come out of it. They had to sedate her." He paused for a moment, his brief sentences the only indication that he was choked with emotion. "She's in a coma. They don't know if she'll come out of it."  
Spider couldn't speak. There was nothing he could say. The last time he'd truly faced the prospect of losing his sister he was ten and too young to understand everything that was happening, but now, 9 years later, he knew exactly what it all meant. The childhood ideals and faith he had before had been jaded out of him by the real world. Unlike what he believed when he was 10, he now knew that bad things often happened to good people and there was nothing anyone could do to stop that. And all of a sudden hope gave up and a single thought crossed his mind. His sister was going to die.  
"Billy? Your mother wants to know if you can get back anytime soon and come see her. I don't know how long she's got."  
Spider snapped back to reality. "I don't know dad. We're patrolling the coastline of Samaru right now."  
His father seemed to understand. "I know William, I know it isn't easy, but your mother just wanted to ask."  
"I'll try dad, I promise." He sighed. "I should go. I'll try and call tonight, about 7. Make sure mum is home." He asked of his father.  
Alexander sighed. "If I can get her away from the hospital son. I'll talk to you later." And, hesitantly, Spider put down the phone. Then, overcome, he put his head in his hands.

There was a knock on Spider's door and he glanced up at the door. It had been an hour since he'd called his father and, while it was his dinner break, Spider hadn't felt hungry and so been hiding in his room for the last 20 minutes. It wasn't his best idea, and this was the third knock on his door since he hadn't turned up for dinner, but he couldn't face anyone right now. So far he'd turned away Buffer, ET and Nav but, before he could turn this person away, the door opened and the person invited themself in. It was Bomber and she was carrying a plate of food in front of her. Spider just looked away as she put it down in front of him.  
"Don't worry, I'm not going to ask you to tell me what happened, I just came to make sure you ate." She said, moving away from the table in an obvious attempt to give him some space.  
"I'm not hungry." Spider returned, not looking at her and knowing he sounded like a grumpy five-year-old.  
Bomber turned. "Fine, don't eat it then." She opened the door and started to leave but his conscience got the better of him.  
"Bomb, I'm sorry. Thanks for this." He picked up his fork and roughly stabbed a boiled potato. The heat rose out of it and Spider wondered whether Bomber had eaten. She usually waited until after dinner. He frowned, feeling worse than he already felt. He glanced up, hoping she'd heard him, and as he did he noticed she was watching him from the doorway.  
She shut the door with a frown. "Are you alright Spi?" She asked, concern etched across her face.  
Spider shrugged. "Maybe." He bit into the potato slowly, trying not to look at her in case she figured out he was really in a very bad way. "We'll see."  
"Well, if you want to talk about it." She offered. He gave her a brief smile. "Now, eat, it will make you feel better!" She said with a smile back. Then she opened the door slowly.  
"Bomber." Spider said quickly, before she could leave. "Gemma's in a bad way." He glanced up again to see Bomber turn, concern on her face. "She had a seizure and they aren't sure she'll wake up from it this time."  
Bomber gaped and Spider realized she worried about Gemma as much as she could. She barely knew his sister, having only met her a few times now, but she worried about her. "Spider, I… that was the phone call earlier?" She paused. "Uh, RO told me." She explained.  
Spider nodded, pushing his chair back and standing up. "Yeah. Mum wants me to come home and see her. They think she hasn't got long."  
"You should go home. You've spoken to the CO haven't you?"  
Spider sighed. "We can't go yet. He says we'll be back on Friday, that's the earliest. I don't know if she has till Friday." His eyes fell to the ground and Bomber could only bite her lip.  
"Spider, I…" She started again, but she couldn't think of anything to say. Sorry just didn't work in this situation. Instead she just looked at the floor.  
Spider didn't need her to say anything because a minute later he was standing next to her, leaning against the wall behind them. She glanced up at him with a blank but slightly sad look and that was enough for Spider. But it seemed it wasn't enough for Bomber. Before he realised what had happened, Bomber was hugging him. He knew it was meant to comfort him, but in reality it seemed she was the one who needed the support. And so, returning the hug, he put his head down on her shoulder with a sigh.  
Neither of them noticed that the door was open. Neither of them noticed Robert Dixon standing there watching them.


	6. Chapter Five: A Godsend

Chapter Five;  
A Godsend

Robert Dixon felt gutted. He thought if he liked her why should he be worried about Bomber hugging other guys – it just proved he was jealous. But then he _was_ her confidant wasn't he? Maybe Spider was just better one then he was. Dumped by the one person he trusted. This wasn't a good day for Robert. He took a deep breath and continued to the Comcen. He sat down and sighed. He'd just witnessed what he took to be the moment that had shattered his heart – but maybe he'd just viewed it wrong. Maybe it was different then he thought…he had been known to jump to conclusions before…it happened. So taking another deep breath he let it out slowly and picked up the sat phone he eyed the name written beside the time; _LS Robert Dixon._ He sighed heavily and picked up the phone from its cradle, he quickly dialled the familiar number.  
"Hello?" A female voice asked. He hadn't heard her voice in nine years; he just hoped they could be civil to each other. After all, Kelly would probably bring them together in some way.  
"Holly…it's me." He said slowly.  
"Oh hey 'me'." She teased, her tone slightly sour.  
"It's Robert." He said annoyed slightly.  
"I know who 'me' is Robert. Contrary to popular belief, I'm not stupid." She replied. He snorted, she spoke again after a short pause, "you never talk to me for nine years and now you ring me up out of the blue? What's wrong?"  
"Just calling to check how things are going." He said lamely.  
"Liar." She accused, monotone.  
"I hate you." He said.  
"I know you do. Now spill." She said her voice sounded as if she'd heard it all before. Either that or she wanted to dismiss him as fast as possible.  
"I just saw the girl I like, hugging another guy…now whether it was as friends or more I don't know," He said. Holly sighed heavily and it also reminded Robert of the sound she used to make when he'd stand by her side jumping up and down and pleading with her to let him do something she didn't want to when they were little kids.  
"Oh boy, you do have girl problems don't you?" She asked slyly, she was enjoying this, "the same thing happened in High School Robert." Holly pointed out.  
"Don't remind me." He said, shivering at the memory of Maria Stilts who had been Robert's crush in year 9. Holly had told her that Robert liked her and she'd told him that she didn't like him back. She said something along the lines of: _How could I like you? You're, like, a geek!_ That had brought Robert, sufficiently, to tears. Causing Holly to stand outside the boy's toilets waiting for him to emerge. Which he eventually did. Twenty-five minutes after their bus left. Leaving them both to make their own way home. Causing – in turn – their father to be mad at them – the purple face kind of mad.  
"What else in going on in that geeky mind of my loveable baby brother hey?" Holly's cheery voice was starting to grate on his nerves. It always had when they were little kids and it hadn't changed.  
"Please do not label me as your _baby_ brother. I'm not a baby." He told her firmly, she laughed.  
"So, what do you want me to use then? _Squirt_?" She offered, he groaned.  
"Just brother is fine – or little if you must." He said, she laughed again.  
"Ok look – this girl – wouldn't happen to be Rebecca Brown would it?" She said. Robert had no idea she knew about Bomber.  
"How did you know?" Robert asked.  
"Educated guess." Holly replied coldly. After nine years she still couldn't talk to him without snapping, snarling or using her coldest tone with him.  
"Please Holly – stop being so cold. I'm making an effort here to talk to you." Robert said.  
"So? She doesn't like you. Neither did Maria." Holly said.  
"That is – I was 15! She thought I was a geek!" Robert said.  
"News Flash! You _are_ a geek, Mr I-can-speak-seven-different-languages-fluently." Holly snapped. _Here we go again,_ Robert thought as he felt annoyance bubble in the pit of his stomach.  
"Holly, please don't make me do this." He said, knowing if she snapped, snarled or was cold to him one more time – he'd hang up.  
"Fine." The line went dead. Robert sighed; he put the phone back in its cradle and ran a hand over his hair. This was not his day. He got up and went to make himself a coffee hoping that Bomber and Spider weren't still in there. Sure enough they weren't there, well Bomber wasn't.  
"You ok Spider?" Robert asked as he walked in, making the younger man jump slightly.  
"Yeah Ro. I'm fine." Spider said.  
"Don't lie, Spider." Robert said, his voice the same toneless and emotionless sound wave it always was. Spider sighed.  
"Look it's nothing. I'm fine." He said, sharply getting up. Robert didn't believe him, but didn't press him, he knew Bomber would probably hurt him if he tried and he'd never hear the end of it.

Holly watched as Kelly played outside with her two best friends. Kelly was so carefree, nothing like what Holly and Robert's childhood had been. Abusive father, a mother that died when they were just kids. It seemed that Kelly had been blessed. But Holly was the one who had grown up too hardened. Kelly was allowed to grow up loving life and believing that she had a family that really loved her. Kelly didn't know her parents. They had been denied custody when she was just one month old. So Holly had to raise her to be the carefree nine-year-old she now was. Somehow Holly tried not to be envious of the nine-year-old because if her childhood had been like that then maybe her and Robert wouldn't be so angry or cold all the time.  
"Kels! Time for Sarah and Zoë to go home!" Holly yelled from the backdoor, all three girls groaned.  
"Can't they stay over?" Kelly asked hopefully, Holly shook her head slowly.  
"Maybe another time. Come on. I'll drive you home." Holly said. Kelly always wanted Sarah and Zoë to stay over but Holly never let them. She knew she'd never get any sleep!

Robert found himself doing something he thought he'd never do, he avoided the galley until he absolutely had to eat and if he forgot or wasn't hungry he'd have a tray of food placed in front of him by the one person his sub conscious was trying to avoid and ignore.  
"You're avoiding me." She said one afternoon sitting down opposite him in the senior's mess.  
"No I'm not." He said.  
"Yes you are." She said, "I notice these things Robert. Look – I thought we were friends. And now you're blowing me off? That isn't what friendship is Robert. Friends talk and work stuff out, not avoid each other – hoping the problem will just go away. Tell me what's bothering you."  
"Nothing ok? Just don't worry Bomber, it's nothing. Anyway – I'm not hungry." He stood up ignoring the plate of steaming food in front of him and went up to the bridge, blinking back bitterly hot tears.

"Hello?" Holly's voice sounded surprised.  
"Holly!" For once in his life Robert was glad to hear her voice.  
"Robbie? What is it? What's wrong?" Holly sounded genuinely concerned – he caught her with her guard down.  
"I caught myself tearing up!" He hissed.  
"Oh, you were crying? Oh that's cute." She put on her sugary sweet voice.  
"No not crying! Just tearing up! What is happening to me?" He snapped.  
"Sounds like you're in love Robbie. This Bomber girl must have some effect on you." She said; her voice still held it's sweet coating.  
"Bomb…how did you…are you stalking me?" He accused. Holly laughed bitterly.  
"HA! Says the guy who forced me to cancel my dinner date with Darryl because he was stalking _me_!" Holly snapped.  
"I was worried about you!" Robert tried to defend himself.  
"Why? I'm 29! I can take perfect care of myself!" Holly said angrily. She wanted to hang up, but the underlying saddened tone in Robert's voice made her stay on the line.  
"Holly, please. You're always right. You always were. You have to tell me what to do to get through this." Robert said he was starting to scare Holly, he sounded desperate.  
"God Robbie…look…talk to me ok? Yeah I miss talking to you as well. Kelly really wants to know who the little boy is in all my photos. She wants to know you. When you get back – come and talk to me. We'll sort it out." Holly said.


	7. Chapter Six: Pease

Chapter Six;  
Pleas(e)

Wednesday afternoon. Still no sign of land. Two figures sat on the deck. She had her knees pulled up under chin, and he was staring out to sea. They both had jobs to do, they both had paperwork to do, but no one was chasing them up on it. In fact, everyone on the Hammersley seemed to understand why the duo were out there most afternoons just waiting for some sign of base. He was fiddling with a button, staring out to the horizon. She had her head on her knees, watching him. She was concerned, very concerned, but more than anything a feeling of guilt lingered in her mind. Guilt about how she was treating her best friend, her confidant, RO. He'd been ignoring her lately and she knew why. All this time she'd been spending with Spider over the last few days, since he'd heard about his sister, had clearly confused RO. Either that or he was jealous. But then, maybe that was just Bomber being hopeful. So now, here she was, caught between a rock and a hard place. She couldn't confide in RO the truth about why she spent all this time with Spider, but she couldn't ignore Spider's pain either. So, instead, she'd chosen the right thing to do. On Friday they'd reach shore and she'd be able to talk to RO. The minute he knew the truth, knew how much keeping things from him had hurt her, then he'd understand. Hopefully.  
"You look tired." A voice broke Bomber's thoughts and she refocused her eyes to note that Spider was watching her. She gave him a small smile but he didn't buy it. "Bomb?"  
Bomber sighed. "Spi, I'm fine. Really. Don't worry about me."  
Spider looked like he was about to say something else, but then he stopped and, Bomber could see, caught himself. She wondered silently what he had been intending to say but didn't have long when he did finally speak. "Have you been sleeping alright?"  
Bomber gave a dry chuckle. "Yeah mum, I've been sleeping fine." Her tone was slightly sarcastic, but Spider didn't crack a smile. Bomber got serious. "It's nothing."  
Spider turned towards her, pulling his leg out from under him and shifting his weight. "C'mon, tell me what's wrong." He finally gave a small, sad smile. "'Dear Abby' wants to fix your problems."  
Lifting her head Bomber silently thanked the heavens for the ending of that mess she and Spider had gone through when she'd first joined. "It's RO. I think I've offended him. He won't talk to me."  
Spider nodded slowly. "Yeah, I've noticed that." Bomber tried not to think about why Spider had been noticing things like that in her life. "Do you know what you've done?"  
She was determined not to tell him the truth, that he and his problem was part of the problem. She knew the first thing he'd feel obliged to do was tell RO the truth and now she thought about it, what right did RO have to ask that of her? She suddenly felt a bit betrayed by, not to mention a bit angry with, one Leading Seaman Dixon. "I don't know." She resigned herself to, masking the sudden anger at RO on her face.  
Spider laid his head back on the bulkhead behind him and gave a small chuckle. "Then you're stuffed."  
For good measure Bomber leaned over and punched him in the arm. "You're as useful as a wet dog."  
Spider put his head up and smiled. "Woof?" Bomber shifted back to her spot with a smile and the two lapsed back into silence.

Later that day, a little before she was due to start dinner, Bomber sat in her room thinking what about she needed to say to RO. She knew she couldn't tell him the truth, betray Spider's confidence, but at the same time she knew she couldn't lie to him. It actually did hurt her to lie to him. And even now not telling him hurt her. She wanted to tell him everything, every one of her problems because she knew he'd know the exact right thing to say. She wanted to tell him her entire life up until now and hear about his. She wanted to know what his family had been like, what they were like now. Wanted to know about his previous girlfriends although she knew that if he spoke about them with passion still in his voice then she'd be hurt. She wanted to know everything, tell him everything. But at the same time she knew she couldn't betray Spider.  
That day when he'd told her everything after rejecting the aid of others, people he had known longer than her and had a better friendship with, she had felt special. It was something to trust someone with everything about you, it was another to have that trust thrust on you. And while she had already trusted with Spider things that she had struggled to tell anyone else, like the relationship with her mother, to have something like this confided in her was another thing altogether. And then, for some reason, she'd allowed her worries for Gemma and Spider to overwhelm her. Forced from him a comfort that she didn't deserve. He was the one about to lose a sister. Not her. But he'd responded, hugged her back. And now she was even more confused then ever before.  
Her head in her hands as she sat on her bed, Bomber knew she had to talk to someone about this. More than just someone, but someone who would listen and not judge. She decided to put her name on the call list the next morning. She needed to talk to her sister.

Dinner had been uneventful and now Bomber leant against a bench top in the kitchen, eating slowly from a plate of food. She stabbed a small gathering of peas rather forcefully and a few flew to the floor. One rolled at the feet of Spider, who had joined her for tea in the galley. He glanced down at the pea rather lazily and chuckled. He then lifted his foot to squash it.  
"Don't you dare." Bomber warned.  
Spider grinned. "What, do you still want to eat it?"  
Bomber frowned at him. "Yeah, I wanna eat it." She said facetiously, pulling a face. Spider laughed then picked it up and threw it at her. She ducked and it missed her, but it did land on her plate, rolling back into her pile of peas. This just made Spider laugh harder as Bomber tried to work out what pea was the floor one. Eventually she gave up and, finding a small spoon, scooped up a small pile of peas and flicked them at him. Peas rained down on the seaman and he gaped, surprised that he'd managed to get such a reaction from the fiery chef. But now he knew better than to push it. He put down his fork and held his hands aloft.  
"I surrender!" He laughed.  
Bomber didn't relent. She scooped up another small pile and flicked them at him. He eyed her as she laughed. "So much for white flag. You're dead." Grabbing a small handful of his own peas, he threw them back at her. Two landed and stayed in her hair. As she started to scoop up another spoonful with a laugh, there came a voice from the doorway.  
"I hope I'm not interrupting anything." RO, looking at them sourly, walked into the kitchen and over to the canister of boiled water. Filling his mug silently, he turned to leave when Bomber stopped him.  
"RO, I…" She started but he turned and pointed to her hair.  
"You have two peas in your hair." He said matter-of-factly before turning to leave.  
"RO stop." Bomber said quickly, catching him and Spider off guard. They both looked at her with surprise. She spoke to both of them. "I've had enough so listen." She gave them a look that simply said 'or else' then picked the peas out of her hair. "We need to talk."


	8. Chapter Seven: Talk Things Out

Chapter Seven:  
Talk Things Out

"We need to talk." Bomber said, a bit softer now. Robert merely cocked an eyebrow and let a ghost of a smirk cross his sour expression.  
"Talk?" He said feigning confusion, "Talk…remind me _Rebecca_," the added use of her full name made her cringe, "what talk is. I don't believe you and I have done that lately. So when you figure it out. Let me know." He ignored her calls of his name and he walked off. Spider looked at Bomber and she just sighed. She'd have to get to RO sooner or later. But she didn't know how. All of she knew of him was all he'd told her. What of his family? She had no idea. He hadn't mentioned them a lot. If at all. Bomber suddenly bolted from the galley and followed him. She caught up with him on the stairs leading to the bridge.  
"RO, please just hear me out." He turned on her, his eyes stone cold and not a hint of softening, it hurt Bomber, hurt a lot.  
"Hear you out? If you've got problems go and talk to Spider. You seem to spend a lot of time with him! Maybe he's got some time to talk, but unlike the both of you I have work to do." Before RO could move to go up to the bridge Bomber snapped and slapped him hard across the face, causing him to drop his drink. He stared at her a moment mouth slightly open as if he'd only just noticed her.  
"Robert, hear me out or you'll get slapped again, and you won't be fed for a month." She threatened.  
"I've got _work_ to do. So you'd better get back to work too Able." He said coldly, for the first time in the time they'd been friends he pulled rank. Bomber couldn't do anything now.  
"Yes Leader." She turned and walked away. Robert continued up to the bridge. He ignored the looks he got from ET and Nav who must have heard what Bomber had said. He didn't want to talk about it with them. He didn't need to tell them anything and didn't exactly want to either.  
"He pulled rank." Bomber said as she joined Spider in the galley again.  
"I'm sorry." He gave Bomber a sad smile. She returned it slowly.  
"I need to get into his head somehow. Let him know that he is still my friend. Any ideas?"  
A mischieviosu smile crossed Spider's face. "Uh, yeah, I can think of someone."

**Riiiiiiiiiiing! Riiiiiiiiiiing! Riiiiiiiiiiing! Riiiiiiiiiiing! Riiiiiiiiiiing!**_ Hi, you've reached Holly, Robert and Kelly Dixon. We can't take your call right now, so leave your name and number and we'll get back to you._**BEEP!** Rebecca sighed and started her message.  
"Hey, this is Able Seaman Rebecca Brown of the HMAS Hammersley. I need your help, Holly. Robert and I are friends but we've had a fight and he won't talk to me. I know it probably seems really childish but I need to let him know that he's still my friend and I that I still need him. I was hoping you could help. Thanks." She hung up. She sighed and shook her head slowly who was she kidding? Holly wouldn't help her. She didn't even know Bomber. So why would she help?

"RO, Hammersley." Robert thought it might have been Navcom, but he wasn't ready for the voice that answered him.  
"Hey it's me." Holly. He inwardly groaned and rolled his eyes.  
"Holly? Since when do you call me?" He asked.  
"Since I've had a change of heart and I need to talk to you." She responded sarcastically.  
"Ok…spill." He said.  
"Actually this isn't really my choice at all. I've had a friend of yours call. She needed my help." Holly confessed, Robert raised an eyebrow, but realized she couldn't see him. One word caught his attention.  
"She?" He needed this confirmed he could've heard her wrong.  
"Bomber. She still needs you as a friend Robbie. Whether you like it or not, she is still in need of someone who will listen to her. Who won't judge her for the reasons you are. I know you and her have had a fight, she told me. Look, if this is about that guy she was hugging – don't sweat the petty stuff Rob. Just…tell her that you're annoyed that she isn't turning to you anymore for help. Maybe for her it's just as friends. Tell her that you'll help her – anyway you can." Holly said, she sounded genuine.  
"Who are you to tell me that?" Robert spat.  
"Robbie – I've lived just a little more than you have. Not so much longer, but more. I know what it's like to have friends turn their backs on you. So don't let Bomber feel that way. Please. I wouldn't wish that feeling on my worst enemy." Holly said, she sounded as if she was about to cry but Robert knew better.  
RO sighed. "I'll try."  
He could hear his sister smile. "Then that's all I can ask of you little brother." And she hung up. RO stared at the phone then went back to work promising himself he'd listen to his sister's advice… eventually.

Spider knew he should call his father, but after that afternoon's ordeal with RO and Bomber, which had now left Bomber in the galley cooking quietly and pretending she was 'fine', Spider took his phone call to someone else. Someone he hadn't spoke to in a while.  
The person that picked up had a voice he didn't know, and that saddened Spider, but then he lost her to a voice he did know. "Hell, Rick Webb." The man said.  
Spider took a deep breath. "Rick? It's Billy. We need to talk big brother."


	9. Chapter Eight: Brothers

Chapter Eight;  
Brothers…

The phone rang three times before a small female voice picked up. It was only young, one of the girls, and this was confirmed when she pulled the phone away from her ear to scream out 'dad' into the house beyond. There was a brief rattle, and then a voice Spider did know picked up. "Hello, Rick Webb."  
"Rick? It's Billy. We need to talk big brother." Spider said quickly.  
Rick was silent. Spider didn't blame him. The brothers hadn't spoken in years, Rick hadn't even come to Spider's recruit school graduation, and now out of the blue here he was. But Rick knew what this was about. "Mum's already called me about Gemma. I can't make it. The girls have school, Sarah has to work and…"  
Spider cut him off. "Stop making excuses Richard, our sister is sick."  
"Oh yeah, so where are you right now? By her bedside?" Rick said angrily.  
Spider paused. "I'm going to take the high road and ignore that." He finally managed.  
Rick sighed. "You don't get it Billy, I can't face her like this."  
"So that's why you never come see us? Why I have two nieces I've never met. Do you know how that feels?"  
"And do you know how it feels to know you destroyed your smart, beautiful and talented sister's life? You don't know how this feels."  
"Then tell me how it feels. How do you expect people to understand if you pack up and run off to the other side of the country? You never call mum. You broke her heart when you left." Rick was silent so Spider continued. "What do you tell your daughters? That you don't have parents, siblings?"  
Rick growled, his growl sounding so much like Spider's own. "Charlie and Prue don't know about you and Gemma, no. I have pictures of mum and dad."  
"And you tell them what? They're dead?" Rick's silence gave Spider the answer he'd requested. "You do don't you? You lie to your own daughters and deny mum any chance to meet her grandchildren. You're sick."  
"Don't get high and mighty on me William, I didn't ask to be in this situation."  
"Maybe not, but you certainly played yourself well into it. It's just so much easier to lie."  
"And it's so much easier to blame everyone else. What about you Billy? You ran away to the Navy and never looked back." Rick muttered.  
"It isn't like that." Spider protested.  
"Oh isn't it? What is it then? Civic duty. You don't have a 'civic duty' bone in your body."  
"And keeping murderers and rapists out of gaol is a civic duty?" Spider replied spitefully.  
"I've always wanted to be a lawyer. When you were young your life's ambition was to be a clown in the circus or play professional soccer in the EPL for Newcastle United."  
"Yeah well it all changed as I got older. Not that you'd know, you weren't there!" Spider's voice rose as he grew angrier with his brother. He was suddenly very happy the CO had been offering him the quiet of his office because he didn't know how he'd explain this off to anyone else. As far as everyone on board knew Spider was a very-mothered only child. He didn't need to ruin that image (which he had grown fond of) by airing the dirty washing that was his real family.  
Rick was quiet then the anger in his voice ebbed away. "I'm not going to fight with you Billy. I haven't got the time or…"  
Spider broke across him. "You haven't got the time? You haven't got the time for anyone Rick, that's the problem." His anger was still there.  
"I have to go Billy, Prue needs help with her homework. I'll call mum and see how Gemma is tomorrow night."  
Spider sighed. "Fine." But just before Rick could hang up he asked one last question. "If Prue asks who was on the phone, what will you tell her?"  
"It was someone from work."  
"And if mum calls and tells you Gemma has died, what then?"  
But Rick had nothing and soon enough Spider's question was met with just the constant beeping that told Spider Rick had hung up. Putting down the phone Spider put his head in his hands.

He was sitting there for almost an hour before there was a knock on the CO's door and it opened before Spider could regain his composure. So, standing in the doorway, RO's eyes were met with the slightly broken figure of Spider. He frowned as Spider pushed himself to his feet, his cheeks reddening a little with embarrassment. "What do you want RO?" Spider asked, awakening RO from the hundreds of theories running through Spider's head.  
"Sorry, I didn't realize you were still here."  
Spider shook his head. "It's fine. I better go anyway, before the CO hates me for using up his time." He gave a brave smile as he pushed past RO.  
RO frowned and turned. "Spider?" Spider stopped and glanced back at him. "Is there anything I can do?" He asked, unsure why he suddenly felt an urge to help.  
Spider thought for a moment then nodded slowly. "If you really want to help you could try talking to Bomber. She's been a great friend to me, but I think she's going through other things she needs your help with right now. If you could talk to her, maybe? She won't open up to me." Then, with his usual quirky grin, Spider left.  
RO looked at the ground.


	10. Chapter Nine: Words Like Money

Chapter Nine:  
Words, Like Money

Bomber tried not to watch the clock as it ticked ever closer to 1930. She sighed, willing time to stop so she wouldn't have to do what she was about to do. But, just her luck, it didn't. She moved her eyes away from the clock and went back to scrubbing a pot that was already clean. In fact she was now scrubbing it so hard she was risking scrubbing off the Teflon non-stick coating. She swore softly at it and put it aside. That was the last of the washing up. Now she had to waste her time doing something else until half past se…  
Beet. Beet. Beet. Beet.  
The annoying little alarm on the oven was going off. She'd set it earlier that morning to remind her to go call her sister at seven-thirty and then promptly forgot about it. She gave it a hearty jab with her thumb and it fell silent. Then, watching the second-hand dance closer and closer to the 12, she threw down her tea towel and gave up. They won, she lost. Time to go call her sister.  
Knocking on the Comm Room door, it was opened quickly by a blank-faced RO. Still put-off by their angry silence, Bomber said nothing and just went straight to the phone. Dialing an all-too-familiar number, she was met by Jessie's very excited voice the minute it stopped ringing.  
"Rebecca Jane Brown, you are 2 minutes late." She laughed. "But that's okay because I only just got Alex down for a nap." She explained, referring to her 13-month old son Alexander. "How's the high seas?"  
Bomber sighed. For so long the sisters had avoided talking, until just 20 months ago when baby Alex had been discovered and everything had changed. Out of the blue Bomber had got a call from Jessica's husband Tom telling her they were expecting a child and were about to get married. He almost forced Bomber to contact her sister and she had. Now they seemed to be making up for lost time, with Jessica expecting a call every two weeks. It was difficult, but Bomber did her best. But unlike their usual inane chatter, Bombe knew this call would be serious. "How's the farm?" Bomber asked, cutting over her sister's jokes.  
Jessica finally grew serious. "The bank called again. It isn't looking good Bec. We're up to our eyeballs in debt."  
"Did you get my cheque?"  
"Yeah but it isn't enough. We're saving everything we can but with four mouths to feed it isn't like we c…"  
Bomber cut across her. "Four?"  
"Mum Becca. Mum is still here. She can't work. The doctors say she's clinically depressed or something. She just stays in bed all day."  
Bomber frowned, glancing at the silver bracelet around her right wrist. "What is it?"  
"The farm. She's distraught. If we lose the farm Bec we lose the last of dad's heritage. Without the farm that's it, he's really gone."  
Bomber sighed. "I'll send you everything I can, but we can only pray from then on." Jessica sighed. "I'm sorry but that's all we can do."  
"I know, but that's not going to be enough is it?"  
Bomber frowned. "That's better than what most people have Jess. We should be happy with what we do have instead of stressing about this. It's just money. It's not like any of us are on our deathbeds." Bomber glanced behind her to find RO had stopped scanning papers and was now listening.  
Jess seemed to catch Bomber's snap. "What's happened Bec?"  
"Nothing. Just, I… I need to go. There's things to do."  
"Bec? Talk to me. If something's happening I just want to help." Jess said, sounding a little teary.  
Bomber blocked out her sister's requests. "I have to go. Bye." She put down the phone then stared at it in silence. It was then that RO finally spoke.

"Trouble at home?" He asked, still blank-faced but his tone was warmer than Bec expected. She offered a smile but it didn't work. RO knew her better then that.  
"It's just…this drought and all. My Mum's not well and my sister and her husband are up to here with debt." Bec said she leant back against the desk. RO looked up at her with as much sympathy he could muster. Holly's phone call had given him something to think about. Her words came back to him now. _Tell her that you'll help her – anyway possible._ He took a deep breath.  
"Do you want me to help?" He offered.  
"Help? How?" She asked, confused.  
"Offer my own money as well." He said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.  
"Are you crazy? What about your family?" Bomber exploded.  
"Holly has child endowment sent to her for Kelly and she's still got the money she earns from the Air Force, not to mention the carer's pension for Melody." Robert said.  
"Are you sure?" Rebecca didn't want to put Ro or Holly out at all by denying his sister extra funds she may need.  
"Sure. Holly won't mind. She tends to have a way of talking sense into me." He said offering the best smile he could. Bec returned it. She knew she could get him to return to the way it was before.  
"Don't worry about the money Ro. It's just money. I'll send Jessie some more and we'll see how it goes from there." Rebecca turned to leave.  
"Bomber – Hold on." She paused, "I found Spider in the CO's cabin before. Know why he was there?"  
"No…" Rebecca paused, the lie forming as she spoke it, "I guess he needed a bit of privacy for a phone call and the CO offered his cabin to him. I don't know. Maybe it's a family thing." Rebecca mentally slapped herself, she'd said too much already. She left and Robert started back with his papers, he paused and thought about what she'd said. He opened the filing cabinet and pulled out a folder that he'd never cared to look at. Spider's.  
_Webb_

_William (Billy)_  
_16th March 1989_  
_Julie & Alexander Webb (Mother's maiden name unknown)_  
_Richard Alexander & Gemma Victoria_

His siblings' names. As far as Ro knew Spider never talked about his family. The crew thought he was a well-mothered child. Frowning Ro kept reading finding out that Gemma no longer lived at home with Spider's parents. She lived in a nursing home for young People. Robert frowned again heavier this time. Family thing? Could Spider's sister be in trouble? No wonder Spider was keeping to himself. No one knew about his sister. That's why! Robert put the folder back in the cabinet and sighed. That's why Bec was spending so much time with Spider! It was perfect – sort of – he opened up to her about his sister and she, while worried about her family, kept her problems second to his. It fitted into place perfectly. He had to help…but how could he possibly if Spider didn't want him to know about it? He'd think of something. Or Holly would. Who knows what goes on in that mind of his sister…he sure didn't.


	11. Chapter Ten: When Friday Comes

Chapter Ten:  
When Friday Comes

Spider stared at the clock, unable to sleep. In three hours they were due to dock at Cairns base where he knew the ADF would have put together something to get him to Sydney as soon as possible. But now, it was weird, suddenly he didn't want to go. Maybe it was the realisation that he was so close to maybe seeing his sister alive for the very last time. Until now it had been about getting home and he'd been able to focus on anything else – seeing land, his brother, even Bomber's problems with RO. Now, well now he had to deal with this… his sister was really bad.  
Sitting up with a sigh he glanced up at the bunk above him. Up there his bunk- mate Dutchy was snoring contently, not a care in the world. Dutchy didn't know about Spider's problem. No one did. He hadn't even told Buffer. The only person he'd been able to face was Bomber. It was weird how he'd been able to open up to someone he knew so little about and had once terrorised, but there had always been something so honest about the fiery chef that suggested she never judged – and that she understood what it was like to hurt. He wanted to talk to her now, but she'd be asleep. She probably wouldn't see him go either, they were docking just before dawn instead of waiting for light as was usual. Because he had to go. Had to be rushed down to Sydney. Rushed back to watch his sister die.

Bomber wasn't asleep. She was in her galley; torn between making herself a coffee and giving up on sleep altogether or making herself a hot chocolate and forcing herself back to bed. But she knew if she returned to her room without being adequately tired she'd find herself once again on the wrong end of her roommate Princess' pillow and her fellow Able Seaman would hate her. So, grabbing coffee, she perched herself on one of the benches and immersed herself in thoughts. So many washed around in her head. What if Jessie did lose the farm? Where would they go then? And her mum, would this kill her? It seemed likely.  
She thought about RO's offer of money and gave a small smile. She didn't want RO's money, but his offer had been enough for her. It had spread a warm sensation over her skin, like anything could happen now and it would be okay because she had RO on her side. It was good to have him back. But thinking about that conversation earlier that night also reminded her of one thing. She'd almost told RO Spider's secret. She didn't know what she would've done if she'd betrayed his confidences in any way. It was so important to her that Spider had confided in her over anyone else on this ship. It made her forget everything that Spider had ever done to make her life a misery and made her realise that the Hammersley was home now. It was good to finally have somewhere safe like that – where her friends would give anything they had to help her and even her enemies (though she'd never call Spider that) trusted her this much.  
She, like many, hadn't even realised Spider wasn't that spoilt little mothers-boy that people assumed him to be. It was odd to believe that Spider had grown-up in such a tumultuous household. And now they were so close to home she didn't know now what she could do next to make the entire thing easier for him. She knew what it was like to watch someone you love dearly fade away before your eyes but also recalled that there was nothing anyone could say to make it any better.  
She glanced at the clock. They docked in 2 hours and 46 minutes.

Robert didn't feel like sleeping. Even though above him ET was snoring loudly. His thoughts weren't on sleep. His thoughts were on Bomber and Spider. Spider upset about his sister's illness. Bomber becasue of what Holly had told him. He'd called home as soon as he'd figured out what was wrong with Spider. Delighted to hear his sister's voice, she'd laughed at his own vainess.  
"You know...she probably thought you'd thought it was more than it was. See what'd I tell you? Friends. She was supporting him." Holly had shrugged, Robert had heard it in her voice.  
"I offered her help like you told me to." He'd said.  
"Oh yeah? How?" She'd asked. Robert had almost seen her sit down at the kitchen table.  
"Her sister's having trouble with the farm. I offered to help by sending money." He'd said.  
"Awww, my little brother's all grown up!" Holly had cooed.  
"Cut that out...look Holly - can we catch up on shore leave?" Robert had asked.  
"You're always welcome here Robert. Kelly drew something for you too. I've scanned it and emailed it to you. So have a look, I think you'll like it. Or at least I got a kick out of it." Holly had said. After they had ended the call, Robert had opened the emails and sure enough there was an email there titled _Robbie's A Super Friend._ He opened it and had to laugh. Kelly's drawing could easily have been Superman but the colours were wrong and the name over the top was _Robbie_. The cape that Kelly had drawn two of had _SF_ scrawled on it. _Super Friend._ His baby sister was 9 and she still thought like a 6 year old. Shaking his head slowly he'd closed it and planned to show Bomber. She'd get a kick out of it too. Holly really needed to be spoken to about that. But she'd keep. She'd have to stop chocking him in a hug before he could talk to her about it.

Unlike usual the bridge didn't call on everyone as they got closer to shore. Instead they all had to work it out themselves. From their positions around the ship they went to the deck, glancing at one-another as they stepped into the early dawn light. Bomber saw RO and gave him a big grin, then returned her gaze to Spider. The Seaman was white, his eyes looking everywhere but the shore where the three of them could see a small blue car waiting. They guessed it was Spider's car to the airport. In a few hours he'd be with his sister. But he didn't look the least bit happy about that.  
"Are you okay?" Bomber asked softly as she joined him. She shot RO a quick look and he went to the other side of the deck to avoid looking like he was listening in.  
Spider sighed. "I don't know." He finally lifted his eyes from the deck. "What do I do if she dies Bomber?" Bomber bit her lip.  
"I…" She stopped as the ship reached the dock and pulled up alongside. There was a slight bump then they lurched lightly to a stop. "She'll be fine Spider." She finally managed to finish her sentence as movement began on the dock.  
"And if she isn't?" He gave her a look that told Bomber that he was scared in a way he never had been before.  
Bomber couldn't think of anything to say and just glanced up at the sound of the gangplank hitting the dock. It was time for Spider to go. But she couldn't leave it like this. She was saved by the person she'd least expected to speak now. RO. He joined them and glanced quickly at Spider.  
"Then you remember what it was like before." But a second later his business-like tone took over. "You better go." Spider nodded.  
"Yeah." He glanced at Bomber. "If anything happens can I g…"  
He didn't need to finish his sentence. Bomber understood. If anything happened could he call her? Of course he could. She nodded.  
"Of course." Then, slumping as he left, Spider walked off the Hammersley and to the car. Once he was out of sight Bomber turned on RO. "Thank you." RO shrugged in his typical nonchalant way.  
"It was nothing."  
"Yeah, well, it was still the right thing to say. I appreciate it, and I'm sure Spider does too." She sighed. "I'm sorry I couldn't tell you everything. I'm sure Spider won't mind now that I tell you th…"  
"His sister is in care. I know. I read his file." He glanced at the empty dock. "It's okay. I worked it out so, technically, you never betrayed his confidences." He gave a smile, small but nonetheless a smile. Bomber returned it, but bigger.  
"Thanks RO."  
Then, his job done, RO left. In her mind Bomber could almost picture the 'super friend' cape on RO's back. She don't know how she could've helped Spider if she and RO had continued fighting, but none of it mattered now. All that mattered was praying Gemma was okay. Finally tired, however, Bomber returned to her bunk to await a call. One she hoped would be filled with good news.

Bomber was cleaning the galley for about the fourth time that morning when Archie appeared in her doorway.  
"Bomb, CO wants you."  
Bomber gave a small frown as Archie disappeared, wondering what she'd done, but then she remembered the call. She dashed to the bridge where the CO stood talking to RO. He turned when he saw her.  
"Bomber, I assume you understand this message from Spider." He held out a piece of paper he'd scrawled a message on. Bomber smiled when she read it and met RO's eye. Then she looked at the CO.  
"It's good news. And I'm pretty sure it means he'll be back Thursday." The CO smiled.  
"Good translating Bomber." He left and Bomber followed RO back to the communications controls.  
"So, what does it say?" He finally asked as Bomber stood beside him, reading the note for the eighth time. Bomber smiled.  
"It says 'Bomber. Gemma fine, woke up. Rick here too. Looks guilty. Mum ecstatic. Chips for dinner Thursday night? Spider.'" She chuckled. "And do you know the worst thing out of this?"  
"That you will have to cook chips Thursday night?" RO asked, shooting her a look.  
"No, the worst thing is that I now speak French AND Spider." She laughed and made to leave but RO stopped her.  
"Have you spoken to your sister?" Bomber stopped.  
"Yeah, I think we'll be okay. Tom's mum is sending them some money as well. And you and Holly are talking now yes?" She smiled at RO's face. "Well I guessed someone talked some sense into you. I mean, you were pretty angry with me." RO shook his head in disbelief.  
"Sisters. They're just…" His words failed.  
"Infuriating? Annoying?" Bomber offered with a grin.  
"… synonymous with mistakes." RO finished.  
Bomber nodded slowly.  
"Yeah, but that's what second chances are for." Then she left the bridge. RO returned to his work with one thing on his mind. Booking another call to Holly. Where would anyone be without family?

**THE END**

A huge thank you to Holly Dixon. Half of this is hers and with her help i was able to keep going with it. Finally. Lol. So, credit to her as well.


End file.
